“Don’t trick yourself into believing you can’t change your mind or your ways”

– BlessedAsIAm –

I cannot tell you how many times in the past I have allowed myself to believe I could not change my mind or my ways.

I remember one time very clearly, I had just bought my new house, sold my other house and made a huge promotion at work. I was standing in my garden and about to enter the house when I was stopped in my tracks by this overwhelming thought and feeling:

“I know I should be happy and content right now, but why do I feel like I am not?”.

I felt a tightness in my throat, a knot in my belly and I felt as if I could not breathe. It made me sick.

You see, I had wanted to leave that job for years, yet I convinced myself and by listening to others, that it would be a foolish thing to do. I was working for one of the best employers of the country and the money and the perks were not bad.

Because of the challenges I faced when buying the house, I told myself, “you know what, this will be my forever home. It is big enough for a family and when we grow old it is set up to accommodate us as well”.

Girl, did that thought suffocate me and bring me to tears when I stood there in my garden.

Yet I didn’t listen. I was so afraid to even think about changing my mind that I stayed at the same working place and forced myself to accept my living situation fate.

If you have been here for a while, you know I hit rock bottom a few months later. Forcing me to call in sick and house bound.

I realized that tricking myself into believing I could not change my mind or my ways was making me unwell. Spiritually, mentally, emotionally, energetically and physically.

I decided that something needed to change. And so I did. The rest is history.

If there is anything I want you to take from my story is this:

• Living a life that is not true to you can have major consequences.

• True change and transformation begins with believing you can and giving yourself permission to do so.

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